


The Beast and Dragon Adored

by Midnight_Musings



Series: Feelings for Something Lost (in two parts) [1]
Category: Inception (2010)
Genre: Letters, M/M, Post-Canon, Takes place around sixth months after the end of the film
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-08-12 05:19:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 6,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7922035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnight_Musings/pseuds/Midnight_Musings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>"I know what you're thinking. It's twenty fucking eleven. Who writes letters anymore? I didn't want to text you, or call. I like writing. I can get all my thoughts out in one long rush, and once it's down, it's there. They're therapeutic in a way. I've meant to talk to you for a while. There is a lot left unsaid between us. If you don't want to reply to me, if you still hate me for everything that I've done. I'll understand."</em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so a long time ago I wrote this and had a ton of idea's for furthering this, but never got round to it. So in an attempt to make me edit and write more of this I'm posting what I have so far. I know it's not very polished, and I do think (know) Arthur and Eames aren't very in character. However, I hope you enjoy it none the less.
> 
> (i rated this mature as the fic will contain discussion of drinking/violence/sex/drugs)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title from the song 'the beast and dragon adored' by spoon, specifically the lyric - "You been gone so long  
> Where you been for so long"

_September 4th, 2011_

_Eames,_

_It's probably come as a shock to you, reviving this letter. I'm not in trouble, and I know I am the last person you want contacting you, but after the Fisher job, I haven't spoken to anyone. I tried disappearing, but it's hard. Dom has probably asked you if you know where I am, and it's no use checking any of my addresses or calling the numbers you have for me because you won't find me there. I'm safe. That's all you need to know._

_I already know what you're thinking. It's twenty fucking eleven. Who writes letters anymore? I didn't want to text you, or call. I like writing. I can get all my thoughts out in one long rush, and once it's down, it's there. They're therapeutic in a way. I've meant to talk to you for a while. There is a lot left unsaid between us. If you don't want to reply to me. If you still hate me for everything that I've done. I'll understand._

_I only ask that you don't tell Dom that I wrote to you. I can't speak to anyone else right now, and I know it's utterly pathetic because it's been six months since that fucking job, but it has completely fucked with my head. It's weak and unprofessional, but I can't help it, Eames. And you are the only person who understands any of this bullshit. I trust you, I always have and always will. I hope that you still feel the same. I hope that ten years haven't been wasted because of my mistakes._

_I hope you are well._

_Arthur_

* * *

_**25th September, 2011** _

**Arthur,**

**I'm glad you contacted me. When Dom told me he hadn't heard from you in a few months, it did worry me. I was considering getting Saito to track you down.**

**Where have you been Arthur? What are you doing?**

**I know the Fisher job was hard, especially for you. No matter how much you were trying to hide it. I could see it throughout the whole job. I don't think anyone else noticed, but I've known you for the longest. I guess I just never forgot your quirks and the ways you act when something is wrong. I never brought it up because well, we weren't exactly on the best terms. I would've mentioned it to Dom, but he'd just have made things worse, so I ignored it.**

**Arthur, whatever you need I'll give it to you. Just tell me how I can help you. I'm in the house in LA for the next couple months, and I'll say if I'm on a job or anything like that. And you can always visit or call me darling. Christmas is coming up. You can stay with me. It wouldn't be any trouble, and I'd love to see you and talk, face to face.**

**Eames**


	2. Chapter 2

_December 25th, 2011_

_Eames,_

_I fucking hate Christmas. Have I ever told you how much I fucking hate it? I don't even know why sometimes. I'm from a Jewish family, you know that, but we still celebrated Christmas. I guess my parents didn't want us to feel left out, and they always wanted an excuse to get the family together. But I suppose the answer is probably right there. Family._

_You probably think I mean it in a bitter way, and that's not entirely accurate. If anything it's more guilt. I was never enough for them. I dropped out of business school after six months, joined a military program and went off the grid. I left things in a bad way with them and then didn't go home for a year and a half. What sort of fucking son am I? They wanted me to be there. To be someone who they could be proud of, not whatever wreck I turned out to be._

_I'm not sure what my point is, to be honest. I just hate this time of year and just brings up bad memories, that just make feel fucking guilty. Family, Mal, jobs gone wrong, you._

_Yesterday, I messed up. It all got the better of me, which is weak and stupid and I never have healthy reactions to anything. So, I got drunk. I got fucking plastered at a bar and let some random guy fuck me into my own mattress. He was married, Eames. I didn't know. I kicked him out of the flat as soon as he let it slip. See what great person I am. For Christmas, I had sex with a married man. For Christmas, I've potentially broken up a family. Do you see why I hate this fucking holiday?_

_I don't even know why I did it. The guy reminded me of you. Well built, had tattoos. He even spoke a little like you. I've had a lot of Vodka and I'm probably not even going to remember writing this, but I am don't care. I've already fucked this up once, I can't possibly do it again._

_It got me thinking about us. Not exactly us, but what we could have been. Where did it go wrong for us Eames? Or were we doomed from the start? Every event I can think of, I'm always the cause. It was always me doing something to fuck it up. And I'm sorry. I don't know if I ever said it to you properly before, but I am sorry. So that's my question I suppose. Where would we be if I hadn't kept on fucking it up?_

_I really hope I wouldn't be in this shitty apartment in Cairo. I hate this place. Everything reminds me of you, and I just feel guilty for even being here._

_I'd like to think we would be Paris. I know you love it there, and I've always been fond of it myself. We'd be away from everyone and everything. Maybe even have enough money not to do dream-sharing anymore. Maybe I'd be able to sleep at night._

_But what's the point of thinking about what could have been? I didn't let us have that. So it's my fault I don't have it now. I shouldn't get so hung up on it right? I have to live with my choices, and I can't change the past._

_I need you to tell me, Eames. I need you to tell me you forgive me. Because I just have this overwhelming sense of guilt shrieking at me every single day, and I can't take it anymore. It is fucking pathetic, I know that, but I do not want to keep carrying around this, this weight anymore. I know I've said it, but I am sorry. I'm not looking for pity. It's far from that. I need your forgiveness because I think of all those I've wronged, you're the only one that'll listen._

_You saw something in me once Eames, and I understand if that's not there anymore. But sometimes I really think that you are the only one who ever saw something worth forgiving._

_And if I could change what I've done, then I would. In a heartbeat._

_Till next time,_

_Arthur_

* * *

_**January 7th, 2012** _

**Arthur,**

**It's been a while since your last letter, and the lack of replying wasn't because I didn't want to. I just didn't know where to begin.**

**There is nothing to forgive Arthur. We both made mistakes. Whatever it was between us, whatever we had, we both made questionable choices. You're right. We can't change that now. The only thing we can do is forget about it and move on. I don't hold any of it against you, and I know you don't hold anything against me.**

**I do care about you, Arthur. After ten years I could never just stop.** **I mean really darling, what part of ten years is lost on you? I'm not giving up on you. I wouldn't do that.**

**Do you really think so low of me?**

**Stop blaming yourself for things you can't help. Not everything is your fault. It's not your job to be there to please everyone. Your purpose in life isn't to pick up the pieces. You know how I feel about everything regarding Dom, so I'm not getting into that. Especially now it's all over. Just remember there was nothing you could have done. There was nothing anyone could have done.**

**I have to ask Arthur, what is the point of this? I can't help you from the other side of the world through a letter. What does this even do for you? How does getting a message from me assist you in any way? I'm not trying to imply that I don't want you contacting me because I do. I just don't understand what this does. And if you are only looking for forgiveness then you have it.**

**I haven't been back to Paris since the Fisher job. I didn't feel right being there. It made me think about you a lot. And like you said, what's the point on being hung up on what could have been? I'd like to go back one day, but there's nothing for me there.**

**I've been taking a lot fewer jobs lately. Slowly trying to break away from it all. When I was younger, I wanted to be a painter. Fits in well with Paris doesn't it? But I don't like reminiscing. It only makes you feel sorry for yourself about everything you could have done. Brings up a lot of "what ifs". Those are always the worst. What if I'd never got into dream-sharing? What if I'd never met you or Mal? Well, I'd be without Cobb. That is a prospect I quite enjoy. You're probably rolling your eyes right now. You really mustn't my dear. You do it so much your eyes might get stuck in that position. And I'm sure you are now thinking in your pretty little head that is "completely absurd and physically impossible Eames."**

**And now I've made you smile I'm afraid I'll have to send you some less amusing news. Dom has been hassling me about getting in touch with you. He's suspicious and assumes I know where you are. Which is sort of true, but that isn't the point? I know that you want a break from it all Arthur, I really do understand that, but people are worried. You know how desperate Dom must be if he's coming to me. The kids miss you, Arthur. You should go home, even if it's just for a weekend. You can't isolate yourself forever.**

**And now I'm sure that smile is long gone, and you're probably angrily glaring down at this letter, and no petal, you cannot set things on fire with your eyes. I just think it would be good for you if you saw a familiar face. I'm still in LA. I'm not going to be going anywhere for a while. Visit Arthur. You seem like you do with some company.**

**And before you get the wrong idea, this isn't for pity. It's selfish really. I have a need to know about how you are, and I want you to come. I'll understand if you don't, but have a think about it. You don't need to tell me you're coming. You know where I am, and I still keep the spare key in the usual place.**

**I hope you are well darling.**

**All my love**

**E,**


	3. Chapter 3

_January 22nd, 2012_

_Eames,_

_Thank you. I am sorry I suddenly dropped all this on you. I shouldn't have dragged up old feelings. I think I just needed to get it out of my system. To tell the truth, I feel lost. I'm lost, and I don't know where I'm going. For some reason, I feel like you can help me. You won't sugarcoat anything, and you'll be honest. Getting a letter from you does a hell of a lot more than you think._

_I'm attempting to get back into the swing of things; I am, but it's hard. I feel like every move I am making is wrong and every turn I take leads may down this never ending dark road. I don't have a direction anymore. When I was with Cobb, I had a goal, a purpose. When Mal was alive I had an aim; I had that direction. And when I was with you, I had someone to care about, something to make me keep going. And now I've got none of that. This isn't something you can help me with. And before you even suggest it, I won't stay with you. You don't need the trouble of worrying about me._

_I'm taking a job so I'll send you address of the hotel. Here's hoping it gives me some normality._

_If you could do me a favour, visit Dom and check up on him and the kids. See how they all are and tell the James and Phillipa I miss them and that I'll come and see them soon. I know you've had your differences, but I need you to look out for them while I'm gone. Besides, the kids adore you, and deep down, Dom does like you. A little. You can take Ari with you if it makes you feel any better. Is she still in LA?_

_I hope you're doing okay,_

_Arthur_

* * *

_**4th February, 2012** _

**Dearest Arthur,**

**I'm sorry for the late reply, but I've been on a job and haven't had any time to do anything apart from work. I am considering retiring from this bloody profession or just try never to work with incompetent idiots again.**

**I suppose it can't be helped. It went alright in the end, and I left without permanent damage and paid, don't know how that happened, I must have a guardian angel looking out for me. I had forgotten the stupidity of some people. You've spoiled me, dear, you have.**

**I checked up on Cobb and the kids. They seem fine. Adjusted well, I think. He sounds very insistent on finding you. I must say you've been doing rather well to avoid detection, but it is going to be hard once you start taking jobs again. I had to spend a good twenty minutes persuading him not to get Saito on your case, so it really won't be long till he finds you dear.**

**I'll do my best to keep him off your back, but I can't make you any promises. If you want my opinion darling, Cobb thinks of you as a brother. He cares a lot about you and would like to know if you are safe and happy. And you know I am most definitely not the first person in line to defend Dominic Cobb. But please just put his mind at ease. And if I'm lucky it might even stop a bloody headache he's been giving me.**

**I met up with Ariadne a few days ago. She's happy, taking jobs and doing well. Something I discovered is that our young Miss Ariadne has been seeing a particular chemist whom we are both acquainted with. Yes, Arthur darling it happened. I am considering opening a bottle of champagne for the fact they've finally clued on. Also that I will never have to listen to Yusef describing why "Ariadne's eyes make her an even better person!" I assume it's too early to send the engagement gifts? She refused to answer any questions on Yusuf, but she did agree with me on leaving you alone instead of bombarding you with questions. This whole Yusuf thing still fucks with my head. It is like my little sister and my best friend dating (and no Ariadne is not the little sister). She did kick me when I asked her when the wedding was. I mean it's quite ridiculous. How can such a tiny person have that much strength?**

**I'm back in London if you hadn't noticed the change of address. Helena contacted me and is looking for a team. Nothing too complicated, two levels and extraction. She asked for us personally, so I told her I'd ask you because I know you wanted to take jobs. Don't feel obligated to do anything. Just get back to me as soon as you can. Personally, I think it would be good for you to have that structure and format in your life again. But hey, I could be totally wrong. And if you say no then that's also fine. I think Portman is working again.**

**All the best,**

**Eames**

**_PS - I got you a gift. I hope you still wear ties_ **


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short update as schools started pour moi and im already fucking overloaded soz

_February 24th, 2012_

_Eames,_

_I hope your job wasn't too taxing on you, and I'm glad to hear you got out with your money. Though, that is what you get for running with Fullick and his crew. It was them right? They are the only people I can think of who are stupid enough to fuck up a simple one level extraction. I mean really Eames! You still took a job with those bastards even with their track record. You are even more idiotic than I thought. Maybe this will teach you only to take jobs with competent people._

_And speaking of jobs, I can't take Helena's. I've got one lined up, and she won't push back the job just because I'm not available. She doesn't like us that much._

_Also, don't you dare ask Portman! Are you an actual idiot? Pearson is available. He's actually good at his job, does what he's told and can be trusted. Portman? Really? Good god Eames, please tell me you were joking._

_Thank you for checking up on Dom. Also, for telling him to leave me be. I know you don't get on with him, but I'm glad you've put that aside. Even if Dom isn't so happy to see you, the kids always are. I'm sure you're growing on him. Soon you'll be inseparable!_

_Hopefully, you won't have to deal with his questions anymore. I've sent a letter to him (no return address) explaining everything. So with any luck, he'll get the message and back off._

_Onto the most important topic of Ariadne (and yes I do know about her surprising strength. She punched me in the arm once, and I was bruised.) Please tell me she hasn't become a total sap. I won't be able to stand it if they've both gone soft._

_Thank you for the tie by the way. It's very nice and not at all like the clothes you wear, so extra points for you. But really, I do appreciate the gift._

_I hope your job with Helena goes well,_

_Arthur_

* * *

_**March 2nd, 2012** _

**Arthur.**

**What the bloody hell were you thinking!**

**"Dom. I am safe and well. I just need some time alone. I should be back in LA in the next few months (permanently). If you've got any more questions, just ask Eames."**

**Ask Eames. _ASK EAMES_. What have I done dearest? What could I have possibly done to deserve this? This is a terrible thing to do to a man. You know there are less painful ways to drive a someone insane. He keeps calling me. I told him that you are fine, and I had only made a tiny amount of contact with you, but he keeps on calling. He isn't best pleased that I lied about knowing where you are. I'm back in LA. It's only a matter of time until he breaks into the house.**

**Is this revenge for thinking about hiring Portman? Because this is a lot worse. So much worse. Causing a persons' slow descent into insanity is not the same as thinking about hiring (yes I know he's a bit of a bastard) an annoying man.**

**Just make Dom stop. Please, Arthur. I'll do anything. I'm**   **sorry? Is that enough? I am so very sorry. You are a cruel man. Never expected this from you. I am, thoroughly, disappointed.**

**But we will ignore this for the moment so I can tell you about Helena. It turns out she is keener than I thought. She was prepared to push the job back by months just to get you in it. Seemed strange to me. No one with good intentions would do that. No matter how good you are at your job darling. So I said no. She didn't seem happy in the slightest. But it's for the best I think. No matter what her motives were. And I'd never hear the end of it from you if something were to go wrong.**

**I'd better wrap up this letter now, as I am meeting Yusuf for dinner and I'm already running late. And yes don't worry my dear, I'll try to pry as much information about Ari out of him as I can.**

**All my love,**

**Eames**

_**PS: I'm glad you like the gift, but I do not appreciate the making fun of my fashion choices. You love the clothes I wear, and you know it.** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am halvjordan on tumblr, so check there for update news and such.


	5. Chapter 5

_March 19th, 2012_

_Eames,_

_I apologise for setting Dom on you like that. I know I should have given you some warning or at least have been a little less vague in my message to him. However, I haven't had the time. A weak reason I know, and I will drop Dom another message telling him to back off. I went back home; that's my excuse here. Maybe it was what you said about 'moving forward' and all that stuff about letting go, but I just thought I needed to visit._

_I saw Sarah first. I'm sure I've mentioned her before. She's my twin sister. She got engaged last month, and she's always been the nicest and most understanding._

_It was lovely actually, seeing her in person after so long. We speak on the phone a lot, but there's just something different about actually seeing her face. We caught up, had dinner. I let her berate me about not coming home in so long. No arguments, no shouting._

Mom _, Dad and Hannah, were a different story. I knew it'd be like that, to be honest. They were never as open and accepting as Sarah._

_Maybe it's because I'm gay. Or not taking over the family business or maybe it's because I hadn't been home in so long. It could be all of them. But they weren't, overjoyed, to see me. They had a lot of questions, understandably, and a few minor arguments, though there always are with them. It was just, in the end, I suppose. I just thought it'd be different._

_I thought going home was the thing I needed. The closure. Having family back. But nothing's changed. I don't feel any differently. Is that a horrible thing to say? I felt nothing when I saw them. And I wasn't expecting some drastic change, but I didn't think that Sarah would be the only one I felt worth seeing in the end. It got me thinking about whether they feel the same way as I do. Did they feel anything when they saw me?_ Because _it sure as hell didn't feel like it. Do I have a family? I know I have Sarah, but does one sister count?_

_I know, I'm doing it again. Wallowing in self-pity, and I don't mean for it to come across that way, and I know you won't have the answers to any of this, I just feel like you are the only person who'll just listen to me and not. I don't know really. I haven't been sleeping well, and I just can't think properly at the moment. Maybe you can try and pull a coherent answer out of me in your reply._

_About the Helena job. I'm very glad you didn't take it. It seems strange to me, and you're better safe than sorry. No matter what her intentions were. I'll be wary of jobs involving her in the future. And you were right; you'd have never heard the end of it from me if you had taken the job and it had gone south._

_As always, any information of Yusuf and Ari, let me know,_

_Arthur_

_PS: Do you remember that time in Venice, when I threw up on you? That wasn't the blood loss. It was the sight of that shirt you were wearing._

* * *

**_2nd April, 2012_ **

**Dear Arthur,**

**I am very thankful for the follow-up message that you sent to Cobb. He's backed off a bit since then, and you will be very pleased to know that he did not break into my house. I did, however, have a long (and very dull) conversation with him. I was as vague as possible when talking to him about you, but understandably, I did have to disclose some information.**

**In the future darling, send me a warning text. So I have time to flee the country. Or smite myself.**

**About your family, you're right. I don't have any of the answers, and to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure how much comfort I'll be able to give.**

**I am glad that seeing Sarah did give you some satisfaction. She seems like a good person and someone you should have in your life.**

**I can't tell you why seeing the rest of your family didn't help. And I know it must be frustrating that they didn't give you the closure you needed. You may have to consider the possibility that there was nothing there in the first place, so you had nothing to close. Maybe that chapter ended when you came out or left home. There isn't any way of knowing, you just have to, and yes I know I keep saying it. Move forward.**

**I do, however, sincerely object to you saying that you don't have a family, because, bloody hell Arthur, you most certainly do. You have Dom, Phillipa, James, Ari, Sarah. You had Mal. You have me. Your family isn't chosen for you, Arthur. It's not something that is set in stone. You get to decide who's in it. No matter how big or small, or if even no one is related by blood. It still counts, and it's your home. It's where you belong. I know you're a cynic by nature darling, and this is something you don't want to hear, but it is true and something you should accept.**

**Regarding Helena. She was extremely unhappy when I told her no from the both of us. She tried offering me, even more, money, so something was up there. I'll try and rope Simone into finding out some information about it for me.**

**I'll be in New York for a few weeks doing a job, so I've included the address for you to send any replies there.**

**I also, sadly, have not been able to get any more info on _that_ relationship out of either party. If I do, you'll be the first to know.**

**I hope you're well,**

**Eames**

**PS - No more gifts for you. The pair of cufflinks I bought for you will now be sent to Portman as a token of my appreciation for all his good work over the years.**

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the short and kinda shit update  
> but oh well  
> enjoy anyway hummingbirds

_April 18th, 2012_

_Eames,_

_I have some news that you may find somewhat upsetting. I had a phone conversation with a Dominic Cobb the other day, and the topic of you came up. The conversations didn't contain anything of particular interest to me, but there were two quotes that stood out to me. The first being "not a bad guy" and the other "am starting to remember why I used to like him"._

_Do what you would like to with this information._

_I appreciate your words about everything. Sincerely, I do. Of course, I didn't expect you to be able to give any answers. I don't think these are things I'll ever have the answer too, It's something I'll just need to move on from this. And to use a phrase that you love, move forward. Stop clinging to the past. I don't know why I'm so hung up on it. There isn't even anything there for me. What I should be doing is thanking you for humouring me so well. All I seem to be doing is complaining in these letters. It isn't fair to you, but I digress. I agree. They are my family. So are you._

_If you did dig something up on Helena, let me know. It would be useful for my notes._

_Speaking of Simone (this also leads nicely into your next point), I just did a job with her, and it turns out she has become great friends with Ariadne. After plying her with lots of alcohol, let slip to me that Ari and Yusuf had been looking to buy an apartment together in New York. This relationship is moving so much faster than we anticipated. A wedding attendance may be on the cards soon (Ari has already drunkenly promised that I'm her maid of honour so don't even try it)_

_Your change of address is noted._

_All the best._  
_Arthur_

_PS: If you do that I will contact every person we have ever worked with and tell them your full, real on your original birth certificate name._

* * *

_**4th May, 2012** _

**Dearest Arthur,**

**Please consider this my last goodbye. I shall be changing my name and moving to the North Pole. The furthest I can be from Dom Cobb. Don't come looking for me and do not let him know where I am. Will I ever escape his clutches? Let's hope so. (Also Dom used to like me!? YEARS OF ACCADMY TRAINING WASTED! I'M A FAILURE)**

**All joking aside darling. You said to me that this is what you needed. You said it helped. I don't mind what you're saying, as long as it is still, doing something for you. If it is, then you keep on sending, and I will keep replying. If not, work out something that does, and let me know how I can help.**

**Yusuf is now refusing to accept my calls after I asked him about it, and Ari refuses to comment on the matter. Simone is now our go to for information (I don't need to be maid of honour, I'm best man).**

**I hope you're well,**  
**Eames**

**PS - You wouldn't dare.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always my little cupcakes, comments are appreciated


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so sorry at how short the last two have been and this one. Also that we are loosing any sort of plot of character study. The next few chapters should hopefully get us back on track. Thank you <3

_May 20th, 2012_

_Dear Eames,_

_Shall I be addressing all future letters to 'The North Pole' then? You pretty much are a human personification of a Polar Bear, so I think you'll fit in well (wait are polar bears in the North or South pole?)._

_You are still unfathomably annoying, don't worry, I can vouch for that. I have ten years of examples. Would you like me to list them?_

_I'm thinking an Autumn wedding for Ari and Yusuf? Somewhere outdoors, maybe abroad. Thoughts?_

_I'm going to be in London for the next two weeks at my apartment. I've included the address in case you've forgotten it._

_Stay safe,_  
_Arthur_

_PS - Oh, you know I would Terrence Eames Howards._

* * *

_**24th May, 2012** _

**Arthur,**

**There are Polar Bears in the North Pole. I also always considered myself to be more of a shark.**

**(don't say any of that to Ari or she may hit you again)**

**I have a question for you Arthur, and I would very much appreciate it if you did not speculate or ask why I am bringing this up. I also ask that you answer me honestly.**

**Do you think we would have worked? If everything that has happened hadn't. Where do you think we'd be? I know I keep telling you to move forward and not to dwell on these things, and I do it. So much so that you must indulge me on the rare occasion, I get like this. I do know you have brought this up before, but if I remember correctly, vodka was involved on your part, and I'd much prefer a sober answer.**

**I'm also in London and I've included my address. Come and visit. It would be lovely to see you.**

**All the best,**  
**Eames**

**PS - The cufflinks enclosed would look very nice with your fitted black tuxedo.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> any criticism or comments are always welcomed


	8. Chapter 8

_June 8th, 2012_

_Dear Eames,_

_Thank you for confirming that, and you are in no way a shark. Don't flatter yourself so much._

_I'm sorry that I couldn't come and see you. I was only here for work purposes, and that's all I was really able to do. I'm in Moscow right now but am leaving soon, the future address is enclosed._

_I will indulge on this, as you have done so well on doing it for me during our correspondence. And honestly, I'd like to know where you stand on it as well. I know we have discussed it recently, but it seems different now, more able to be honest._

_I think we would have. Yes, we danced around each other a lot and never actually spoke about what we were doing. And I'm sure that would have continued for a long time. But we worked. Despite all that bullshit. If we hadn't been so stupid and just sorted our collective shit out then yes, I am sure we would have had a real life._

_We never do anything normal. Everything about us is unordinary. I think what we both, well what I wanted, was some sort of normality._

_An apartment in Paris, having a quiet life. We both have racked up so much money we wouldn't even need to work. You could paint, I'd do whatever shit normal people do. Maybe we'd have a dog. I'm more of a cat person, to be honest, but I know you love them._

_But, that wasn't how things worked out. We both chose our paths, and after everything, I think it's all worked out for the best. Yes, I may have a lot of regrets about a lot of things. But we aren't in a bad place now. We are probably the best we can be at this, and despite many things, we're happy. I know these letters may not make it seem that way, but I am. We both have a lot to be grateful for._

_Yours,_  
_Arthur_

_PS - You were right, the cufflinks go perfectly with the tux. Your taste may not be as bad as I initially thought._

* * *

**_20th June, 2012_ **

**Arthur,**

**Unless things go very wrong for me, I do not plan on being in Moscow anytime soon. I guess we'll have to wait a while more till we cross paths again. Try not to overwork yourself.**

**We never did communicate well, you're right. I don't know if that worked in our favour or not.**

**Do you think we reminisce about this sort of stuff too much? Don't answer that question, it's more one I'm asking myself. I shouldn't have mentioned this. It was a selfish thing to do. We discussed and buried the hatchet months ago, I shouldn't have dragged it back up. You don't deserve that, we don't. I know this is just going to cause more trouble than it's worth and this will just lead us onto other topics we haven't resolved yet. Sorry Arthur, this was stupid of me. Probably had a little too much Brandy when writing that letter.**

**I hope you're well,**  
**Eames**


	9. Chapter 9

_July 2nd, 2012_

_Eames,_

_I understand asking random bullshit for the sole purpose of just asking it, but goddammit I really don't get you sometimes._

_And, "topics we haven't resolved yet"? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? If you are dragging up shit like Rio to fuck me off, there are less petty and ridiculous ways to do it._

_I'm currently on a job so don't have time to write out everything, just text me and tell me what the hells going on with you. I messaged you twice and you didn't reply. Have you changed your number again?_

  
_Arthur_

* * *

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

_July 30th, 2012_

_Eames,_

_Will you get your head out of your ass and just fucking talk to me?_

_I don't even what the hell I've done wrong, or what you think you have done which is so mortifying you don't say a word to me for a fucking month._

_I thought we were done with these games, Eames. Whatever the hell is going on your head isn't worth this dick behaviour._

_Talk to me,_  
_Arthur_

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i hope this is bringing stuff forward and is now shaped into a coherent narrative.  
> Just two more chapters which i'm almost done with and then this is over. 
> 
> my chapters are only edited by me, and I tend to miss a lot, so if you notice any mistakes please tell me!
> 
> as always my butternut squashes, i hope you liked it and comments are always appreciated


	11. Chapter 11

**August 14th, 2012**

 

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(22:03)** _

**Hi**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:05)_ **

_A fucking month and all you fucking say to me is hi? What the fuck are you playing at Eames?_

**From _'Eames (personal)'_** _  
_

_**(22:08)** _

**I'm sorry Arthur, I know I could make a million and one excuses and none of them would be able to excuse how stupid I've been.**

**From** _**'You'**_

_**(22:10)** _

_I don't want any of your_ _waffling bullshit, Eames. Get to the point. What the hell has been up with you?_

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(22:13)** _

**I felt guilty Arthur. I dragged up all that shit and it seemed like I was trying to pick a fight with you. This isn't easy for me Arthur. Sometimes I need a break, just like you do.**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:17)_ **

_You should have said something to me. I was having to information from Ari and Yusuf about you and worry the shit out of them. I get needing space Eames but you did it in an incredibly selfish way._

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(22:24)** _

**I know Arthur. I know all this. Don't think that I haven't felt bad. But it is a lot easier for someone in the right to make the first move than someone in the wrong.**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:26)_ **

_I made moves. I texted, called, wrote you another fucking letter, those were your opportunities to stop wallowing in whatever bullshit you constructed and talk to me. I won't act like you weren't feeling bad, but you cannot act like I didn't give you chances to talk._

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(22:35)** _

**I'm not trying to make it seem like you didn't try to contact me Arthur. I promise you i'm not. And i'm sorry if it came across that way. I should have just communicated with you. That's always been our problem though hasn't it? We just can't be able to get shit right.**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:39)_ **

_You_ _can't keep just talk your way out of this Eames. There's a lot you aren't telling me, and honestly there's a lot I'm not saying to you either. Look, if you just needed space is your reason then fine. But you can't do shit like this, say some stupid words about the past and expect me to forgive you. It doesn't work like that Eames, and you cannot use that shit to sway my reasoning._

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(22:50)** _

**Okay**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:52)_ **

_Eleven minutes later and all you have to_ _say is okay?_

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:52)_ **

_You know what, ignore that. Let's just drop this okay. Brush it under the rug, not talk about it again._

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(22:54)** _

**This doesn't feel like we've really resolved anything.**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(22:57)_ **

_I don't care, I just want to stop arguing and just get back to normal. Or whatever normal is for us._

**From ' _Eames (personal)'_**

_**(23:01)** _

**Okay** **.**

**From ' _You'_**

**_(23:04)_ **

_Good._

* * *

 


	12. Chapter 12

**Message from _'Arthur (personal number)'_**

**(02:23)**

_I've just had the whole of the 83' Chateaux Margaux you gave me and my decision making probably isn't the best, but fuck it, Dutch Courage or whatever the hell they say. There's stuff you aren't telling me and there are things I'm not telling you so I am hoping to god we aren't telling each other the same thing and fuck I can't do this over text, i'm not a fucking teenager._

_I hope you're still in LA, I'm coming over._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part two - coming very very soon. the first chapter of that should be up next week? Maybe early if life doesn't create a shit storm for me :D


End file.
